Redrum

Question:

Just because my baby screams bloody murder EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. I change her, doesn't necessarily mean that she hates me and will need therapy some day, right? Right?

I actually just cleaned blood out of my ears.

Here she is sleeping another one off. I mean, after a night of only four hours of sleep, a girl has to do what she has to do.

Bath Time!

Lucky Shot

The OB Home Nurse came to visit yesterday. Shirley Jean's discharge weight from the hospital was 7lbs 9oz, and her weight yesterday was 7lbs 14oz. I guess that means the lactation station is in working order--cooking with gas--a well oiled machine, my friends.

I managed to snap this picture on my phone. At this point, her smiles are just a reflex, but still pretty fun. : )

Green Hippie Baby Bubble Butt

Erin: I'd like to exchange these two diaper covers for different sizes. These are too big.

Pretentious Hippie Store Clerk: OK, no problem!

Erin: Also, could you possibly show me a better way to fold the diapers when we use them? It's not going very well and I'm about to give up on having a "Green" baby. [Laughing awkwardly while pulling out a cloth diaper for a demonstration.]

Clerk: Well, I don't know what you expect. You bought the cheapest diapers possible.

Erin: Actually I didn't buy them. They were paid for by my Great-Grandma and supplied by a diaper service.

Clerk: Which diaper service? Blankety Diaper Service?

Erin: Yes...

Clerk: [Grabbing diaper from Erin and moving to the other end of the store.] Hey, OtherClerk, is Blankety is using these cheap diapers?

Erin: Did you think I was lying?

Clerk: [Ignoring question] Well, here's what you need. If you decide you're really going to do this, you should consider buying something nicer.

Erin: Right. Here's the receipt.

* * *

I didn't know Hippies were such asses.

Pun intended.

Nonsense?

Possibly. But I'm sold.

Bear Trap Phenomenon

I once had someone describe breastfeeding to me as, "It's like putting your breast in a bear trap for an hour, then getting an hour break, knowing all the while that in an hour, you have to put your breast back in a bear trap for an hour."
It's not quite that bad, but...still. And it IS getting better.
You know what helps, though?

Things like this:



And this:

Hmmm...

Who do YOU think she looks like?

This Grandma Brenda's birth announcement photo and a photo of Shirley Bug when she came home from the hospital. Isn't that something else?!

I guess I never knew how much Brenda and I looked alike. Haha!

Cyber Baby

She doesn't have her own blog (yet), but my Shirley Bug has made her internet debut!

Check out her hospital birth announcement.

Shirley Jr., meet Shirley Sr.

(My) Grandma Shirley came to meet Shirley Jean on Wednesday morning. It was a very special morning for all of us.

I just can't help myself...

Daddy Cam 1.0

IT'S A GIRL!!!

Shirley Jean Desvousges
joined our family today!!!

March 18, 2008

8lbs. 0 oz.

21 inches

10:28am

Week 41

What's to say? The kid is huge.

Haha.

Actually, I just got home from an encouraging appointment. I had to go in for a stress test for the baby, and it sounds like it is doing just fine in its "overdue environment." The heart rate was strong, my BP was very good and I have gained another two pounds, which I am convinced is ALL. WATER. (I'm down to one pair of shoes that I can get on. I'm going to have to start wearing Richard's soon...) While I was on the monitor we discovered that I was having contractions EXACTLY six minutes apart.
From there, Fern stripped my membranes, which makes me very hopeful because if I was contracting regularly before she did that, maybe it'll kick us into high gear. Or maybe it'll fizzle out and I'll be disappointed again.
I have another stress test scheduled for Thursday morning at 7:15 (ugh!) and an ultrasound scheduled for Friday afternoon. I'm excited about this prospect becuase I've been hoping for another ultrasound!

My goals for today:
-Get the house put back together just the way I like it in case the neighbors have to come let the dog out before any family can get here to take care of him.
-50 squat thrusts.
-Go for a run.
-Wrestle an alligator.
-Chop wood.
-Nap.

Words

Words and phrases I never dreamed of saying out loud, let alone publically until the last two weeks:
-Cervix
-Mucous Plug
-Episiotomy
-Sorry, we can't. We have to go have sex.
-Nipple Stim

Love from Austria

Your text the other day came while I was in the shower.
George called from the other room, "It's from Erin! It's the baby!" I tried to spin around and say what what what?????!!!!! Except we have one of those tiny, install a shower in your kitchen between the stove and the sink just so you can wash yourself every once in awhile, shower module things, and when I tried to turn around, blinded by the soap in my eyes, I banged my head on the shower head and only didn't fall on my ass because my knees banged into the walls of the shower-box, and I kind of crumpled down into a half-fetal position and got stuck there, trying to bat the soap out of my burning eyes and sputtering when George came in and said: "Oh, I guess it says: No Baby... Jenna? What's wrong with you??"

I guess I should be more careful when texting internationally.

Nada

After a rough night on Sunday night, filled with lots of cramps and contractions strong enough to wake me up, I decided to stay home from work yesterday. I was convinced that yesterday was the day.
Alas, here I sit at my desk at work, still pregnant.
Rich and I walked around the Mall of America last night in the hopes of jump starting things, but alas, here I sit at my desk at work, still pregnant.
On the bright side, we spent $5 on an Orange Julius and had a fine time together.
Another bright spot in the otherwise miserable existence that is me is that I got a text message from Jenna. [Hi, Jenna!]
After writing my pathetic post on Sunday, I have come to a conclusion that makes me feel better overall and makes sense of the way I am feeling.
It's not that I'm uncomfortable or miserable (mostly) or even SO ready to be done at work that's bothering me. It's the WAITING. I am tired of being afraid, I'm tired of being nervous, I'm ready to start the next phase of our lives.
There.
I feel better.

Turning 40

Jodi is working on having her baby RIGHT NOW. I don't mind admitting that I laid in bed all day today pouting.
It also occurs to me that some of you might be wondering how I'm doing since I haven't blogged.
Well, I'm 40 weeks today and I'm mad about it.
And I'm ashamed that I'm mad.
Even more shameful, I'm still not all that uncomfortable. I don't want to go back to work.
Pathetic.

Week 39

I've gained 2 more pounds.
BP is fine.
Baby is fine.
Cervix is "paper thin."
Still dilated at 1cm.

There were only three things that made me feel better after my uneventful appointment yesterday.
1. Spring Oreos
2. A friend saying, "Paper thin is so good. You should dilate fast. Good sign."
3. Lauren saying, "Erin. As gay as the television food network is, it's not homo-erotic."

Just what I wanted to hear at 39 weeks.

"My father called again to ask about your cervix."

That's My Sister

So...the other night, Cara had her baby.
I forwarded the text on to Sarah, Naomi, Lauren and Mandi. I won't lie--it was about 5am, so I didn't expect many responses.
At about 5:30, I got a text from Mandi saying, "I'll leave here at 7am!"
I wrote back, "Amanda! It's CARA'S baby!"
She said, "Oh, crap. Back to sleep."
Sorry for the scare, little sister.


Big Toe.